the clog

Rumoku the good samaritan...

Anxious to soften my image as an insane psychopath and criminal mastermind I decided to go and cheer a friend of mine up. This happens to be the same friend who recently broke up with his girlfriend. The one who broke up because of the advice that I gave. Yes, that same friend. Apparently, he hasn't been coming to class for the past three days or so. Being the fantastic friend that I am, I didn't even notice ^_^.

So anyway, after being confronted by the Dean (eeek), I find out that he's been skipping alot of classes of late. It's almost sick to find out that your friend has been AWOL from an authority figure. So why does he tell me this? Apparently, he thinks I'm his best friend since I hang out with him alot. Ack. More guilt...

Dean: What has happened to F? Is he ill?
Rumoku: (Mind spinning like mad) Erm...yes! He is ill! Very ill! (Panicky, but the concern does somehow come through...)
Dean: I see...
Rumoku: In fact, I've been trying to contact him forever now! He just won't pick up the phone! I'm heading over to his place after class to see how he's doing (brilliant form! Magnificent spin doctoring! The crowd goes wild with enthusiasm).
Dean: Very good, carry on.

So Rumoku lives to fight another day. But being bored I decide to pop on by and see how F was doing.

When I got there it didn't look too bad. F just looked like he had been buggered into semi-consciousness which was not too bad, all things considered. I had imagined that he would look alot worse. In my head, I had imagined that he would have looked like he just found out that he was the love child of and ape just as he was buggered to unconciousness by a cross eyed bull. With gonorrhea. Anyway, I somehow manage to convince him to take a shower and come along and bowl with me. I hear that bowling can cure any manner of ills.

But it turns out that we couldn't go bowling because there was a competition going on at the time. Curse the luck. It turns out that bowling wasn't a good idea anyway since it reminded him of his girlfriend anyway. I have no idea why, so don't ask. Maybe her breasts were as hard as bowling balls. Only God knows the truth.

Anyway, to make a long story short, I drag him to the cinema to watch Ocean's 12. It was frikkin' brilliant. It was so brilliant that my sad, heartbroken friend came out grinning ear to ear. My mission accomplished and my mind no longer encumbered by feelings of guilt, I can now get back to the finer things in life. Like torture and video games.

The moral of the story? Go watch Ocean's 12! It's gorgeous!


Rumoku out!