the clog

Interview with the Director...

Following the brilliant unveiling of the plan to corrupt human consciousness's, many a brave young reporter have tried to interview the diabolical mind behind the Hooberskank Project. Here, in a never before seen document, we have exerpts of an interview that unveils the rationale behind the Project. The interviewer has since gone insane from prolonged exposure to the Director, but his work shall live forever...

Interviewer: Nice place you got here, Mr Rumoku
Rumoku: Please, call me Herr Director...
Interviewer: Herr Director? But you're not even German...
Rumoku: Yes, but the title sounds cool and it helps keep my mind focused on world domination
Interviewer: What's wrong with Mein Führer? (Snickering)
Rumoku: Some other bastard already took that name. By the gods, man! Learn your history!
(Silence...)
Interviewer: Sooooooo, yeah, nice place you got here, Herr Director...
Rumoku: Oh, it's not mine. It's my sister's. I'm just crashing here. I plan to move my base of operations into some secluded cave once I scrape enough money together.
Interviewer: Cave?
Rumoku: Yeah. It seems to be the in thing to do nowadays. Most secret base of Operations hafta be in subterranean caves. Heck, even the bad guy in that godawful movie had his HQ in a mountain cave setup.
Interviewer: Right.... Anyway, how did you come up with such a dastardly plan for world domination?
Rumoku: World Domination? Hohohoho. How amusing. The Hooberskank Project is not geared for world domination. It's just an experiment to prove that men think with their penii (plural of penis).
Interviewer: B...but it's evil! Your plan will make men around the world question their masculinity and thus make them more open to subliminal messages implanted in your posts!
Rumoku: And your point is?
Interviewer: That sounds like a plan for world domination to me...
Rumoku: ...and that would be a problem?
Interviewer: I suppose not. Anyway, why the name Hooberskank?
Rumoku: Hohohoho. It's quite clever really...the Project is supposed to simulate the thoughts of a girl who has just broken up with her boyfriend. Prior to that breakup, she was filled with hubris (which sounds kinda like Hoober if you slur the syllables just right) since she thought that she was needed. After her breakup she realizes how shallow her life is and spirals into sexual debauchery...and she became skanky. Hence: Hooberskank.
Interviewer: You just made that meaning up didn't you? You actually just wrote the name Hoobastank wrongly and concocted this fluff idea to cover up your own stupidity...
Rumoku: ...
Interviewer: Well?
Rumoku presses button on wall
Interviewer: Huh? Oh God! Weasels are at my crotch! Oh the humanity! (Drops dead)
Rumoku: I get more bad press this way...oh well, more stuff for me to add to my blog...

Okay, we did say that the Interviewer went insane. Haha. Sorry, wrong interviewer. That was the other interviewer. This one died. The other interviewer now spends his time peeing on the neighbour's flowers....

Viva the Hooberskank Project! Want to join the Project? Interested Candidates reply via the comment post please...